Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Like a frakking motorcycle.

This is probably more honest than I should be. Oh well.

I was a bit surprised this morning when I woke up alone in bed. No no, he usually leaves for work before I wake up. Its just that I woke up and he wasn't unconscious, or even dead. Turns out, I didn't fly into a homicidal rage and kill him in the night. Surprised? Me too.

No amount of shaking, prodding, loud 'relaxation' music, getting up and turning on the light to take Tylenol PM, yelling, tossing or turning would Make. It. Stop. I finally had to resort to pulling the iPod out of the radio and putting on my headphones.

I had to sleep with headphones on. Do you understand?

I keep telling him to stop sleeping on his side. Not just on his side, but half on his own face. The snoring is horrible, and he is always complaining about his shoulders hurting. Well, duh. Last night I really tried everything to get him to turn onto his back. He was literally immovable. The moment I finally settle in with the headphones? Rolls over on his own and the snoring lowers to a dull wheeze. Clearly he was doing it on purpose, for over an hour, just to piss me off.

Will he see a doctor? No. Is it because we don't have health insurance? NO, we have the benefit of military healthcare, F-R-E-E!* He won't see a doctor because he wants to be pummeled to death in the night. He hasn't said so, but its really the only logical conclusion.

*-ish. We pay our taxes, just like you.

1 comment:

  1. alan and annabelle are both HORRIBLE snorers!!! i usually wake alan up and tell him to sleep on his side (that helps him a little sometimes) and when annabelle ends up in our bed halfway through the night (god i wish she would stop that but daddy lets her) i end up having to wake up alan and making him roll her over. for like a month straight i forgot what sleep was like. they were so horrible. i totally feel you girl!!! :)

    Posted by becky (chase) samuelson on April 27, 2007 - Friday at 7:57 AM